Vaine

I have never seen as many vanity license plates as I have in Maine. The plates aren't vain per-say, but there is an overwhelming number of vehicles with personalized "Officer, you must have been driving pretty fast to catch up with me" identifiers. And these plates don't come free, folks. They're an extra fifteen dollars to customize.

Here are a few I've noticed in my three mile radius (I've seen some of these while driving, so I've done my best to remember them) :

WASABI (a lime green Beetle - cute!)
TOODLES (this poor unsuspecting driver had no idea that I was memorizing her plate as she was sitting in the car next to mine)
HRTBRKR (this is very Mariah Carey)
2KBUG1 (it was a Beetle, probably a 2000 model)
835 AD (this is when the Catholic Church [via Pope Gregory IV] established the commemoration of "All Saints Day"...although I'm not sure if this is why the plate says this)
LUCKY US (a vintage convertible Mercedes...this really is vaine)
EGG YOLK (a yellow car)
2 LOUD 4 U (this car was indeed blasting music)
FOXEE (an elderly person was driving this car)
TIDES
1 SWTWLD
CAROL
LE ROX 1
SEAWAYS
BASSETS
MARIE 4
CUB BUS
B GR8FUL
LUCEN UP
BATROB
RADFISH
HIHO
B HAPPY
RUGGER
ASHPEN
PAMMY2
GO STLRS
DAYSTAR
MEZZO
ANGILINA
REBECCA
MEPLUS 2
PAC 3
GG
PARIS
EMP 1
MAND
NAWNY
SANDE
LAMARRE
JOYCE 5
NHV
MACK 26
BLUES
GR8 NANA
3K9KIDS
ARIES
DREEMZ
MTNTOP
BETANA
SPARTA
DEBADOO
DENIS 5
YNKY WMN
YDS
LETS GO
PINETTE
VEGANS (a nice little environmentally-friendly car)
JFINN (um, Juckleberry Finn?)
MOULIN
SMCHUCK (? - this car was flying down the road...it might have been SCHMUCK)
JEEPERS (ha - this was a red Jeep Cherokee)
SIVICK (a Honda Civic)
QUILTS
MASHAJ
HUBRIS1 (this was a gas-guzzling SUV)
P IRISH (this was a green car)
1 BIG EGO (this was an SUV)
MELDEN
ABBY & KT
MY 2 SONS
SHWEET
A1UFO (that was some "out of this world" barbeque sauce!)
LBNAILS
ZINGHA (they really meant "zinger")
BOWLIN
JUNGLE
BTMS UP
DEBLES (perhaps he was dumped by Deb)
MERCEDZ (this vehicle was not a Mercedes, FYI)
MR2
TOY
JAI YOGA
SCR MOM (a mini-van)
MILF
LETPLS
B-GATE
CCD
LE ROUX 1
TOPCAT
AM AM
FM AM
BE COOL
QUEENY
BOOKWMN
RON N
JUELZNT (word, dawg..."I wear my juelznt and that's no shniznit.")
C NILE (ha - either they've seen the Nile, or they're senile)
I GO 2
MARK836 (a plate with a message)
AD79 (Vesuvius' eruption, destruction of Pompeii...perhaps their car survived?)
744 JK (I'm not sure this is really a vanity plate, but if it is, maybe it's like, "I was born in July 1944...just kidding!")


Ok, one afternoon, I just went to the bank and post office, maybe one or two miles away:

MS HAPPY
TUVA
CMOORE
NURS 06
LINDY 2
BETALOU
GRITSRL
MAREMMA
2 DAUTRS
MML RLL
DEFRAG (um, computer geek)
JZ 95 (a rapper, perhaps?)
MIDMOD1
BCHBUM (I like to think this could go two ways: "beachbum" or "*#%!bum")
88 MU (a pianist? - 88 keys on a piano)
92 MU (maybe neither this nor the previous are vanity plates, or else this person goofed and thought there are 92 keys on a piano)
RON N


The following were hanging on the walls of a local pub:

WEBBA (their last name's really "Webber")
MZ FITZ (this is cool)
NIMBLE (Jack be)
ACTPRN (ha - "accident prone")
GRUNGE
B-MOVIE
GET AUTO (which obviously wasn't a problem for this driver...or maybe it was, which is why their plate's hanging on a wall)
SKYDVE1
FATHEAD
BARKIN
STINGER
TOPCAT
IMPACT
TOPGUNS
TOYS
KRUGLE
FIR
SWAT (...at those darn mosquitos, see my Small Town Adventures entry and you'll understand)
A PIRATE
SHIPYRD (maybe A PIRATE and SHIPYRD knew each other..."arrrgh, matey.")
SNSHIN


I rest my case.