This Is What It Sounds Like, When Ducks Fly

So, here at band camp, Sarah thought it would be fun to catch the young musicians in the act of breaking curfew, as it is rumored that they check-in when they are supposed to, but later sneak out like little hoodlums "without the resident advisors knowing".

Below is Sarah's email us other RAs, inviting us to hide outside of their dorms and bust them as they surreptitiously attempt to do who-knows-what in the late hours of the night. Her email was written in some sort-of bizarre ninja duck code, but strangely enough, we all seemed to understand and immediately reciprocated responses in the same language. Following the RA responses are the results of our adventures.


SARAH'S EMAIL :

Top Secret : Members of FNAUF (Female Ninjas Against Underage Fornication)

The Mission : Thursday, the duck flies at midnight. Or actually, any time. He's a flexible duck. He will continue to fly until he busts some underagers.

The Supplies : It is a camouflaged duck, a duck of dark feathers hidden by the night, with only his waterfowl eyes shining from beneath the blackness. The duck recommends shoes that promote stealth creeping, along with dark clothing that breathes and bug repellent to ward off the six-legged enemy. The duck is also armed with a frisbee and a wiffle ball bat, so as to thwart the evil intentions of young cavorters looking to pickle one another in the wee hours.

The Recruitment : This mission is top secret. You have been selected as amongst the loyal. (And as the people who expressed an interest in being ninjas.) Should you feel back-up is needed, you may supplement our forces with additional loyalists, but remember - should treason be suspected you will both be killed.

Confirm your intent to participate in the mission to Agent Ebisumaru-Sarah immediately. Further instructions to follow.


THE RA RESPONSES :

Carrie (personally, my favorite response) :

I suggest the 'flying V' formation--it allows for the greatest resiliency and seethes with opportunity to exhibit super-macho ninja prowess. Ninjas, unite. Ahrrrrrr! - Mighty Duck-Pirate of the CarrieBean*

*Note how funny this is because Carrie's last name is Bean.

Amanda :

This duck is perched and ready to swoop. - Dark Wing Duck Sauce Ninja Lord Amanda

Bonnie :

Quack. - Einnob Choi*

*"Einnob" is "Bonnie" backward. You probably noticed this, but I didn't...

Me :

This flexible duck will fly high like a sleek jetliner, however not too late as she has a piano lesson the next morning at 9.30 a.m. with The Great Winged Master himself: Martin Can-in* a pond. Super Samurai Sophia Ninja is ready for any and all action and bustin' satisfaction. This is what it sounds like, when ducks fly.

*Martin Canin is my piano teacher.


THE RESULTS :

The ninja ducks assembled in our apartment at 11 p.m., all dressed in dark garb. Amanda wore a spelunking head lamp and held an orange wiffleball bat in hand. She and Sarah both had black socks on their arms, and Carrie sported a dangerous skull scarf. I didn't have any really tough apparel, so I wore my sleeping eye mask from the Body Shop and carried a feather duster, but I sure looked mean.

We made our way over to the dorms, running and hiding from tree to tree, and performing covert drop-and-rolls when necessary (and they were always necessary). Waiting for the underagers to sneak out got a little old, so we kept ourselves busy by practicing ninja moves. I began to hug trees. I felt a little bad that we were really trying to bust the campers, but then I remembered that they really shouldn't be out at night by themselves because it can be dangerous. Band camp is liable if anything happens to them. I got all back into my ninja-ness and layed low to the ground.

Just when we were about to call it quits, we heard a door creak open. Out walked two unsuspecting teenagers. Us ninja ducks cocked our heads, made our move, and began running after them, while simultaneously attempting to conceal our identity behind large trees. The teens saw us coming and scurried back into their dorm like little field mice. Shiela, one of the ninja ducks, and I followed them up with stealth and agility. As their RA, Sheila knew where they lived and busted the two little trespassers!

Full of ninja pride, Sarah and I ventured back to our apartment. I wondered why the girls we busted didn't ask us, "Um, why are you guys all wearing black, and why do you have a sleep mask and a feather duster?" If we would have told them we were ninja ducks, they might not have understood. I think it was better that they didn't know.